Well first off let me introduce myself, my name is Brianna and I'm 18 years old. A little background of myself I graduated high school at 16, graduated college at 18. That might seem like I had a good childhood and that everything was good but you may not believe what I have been through, throughout my life. I have 15 brothers and sisters, which 9 are from my mom but 2 did not make it (which I think the Lord may have needed them earlier) and then 6 are from my dad, one of which I haven't met. I have a pretty big family you may say but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I would like to apologize in an advance for this may be long. But I would like to let you know of myself a little more. Not that many people know what I went through.
I grew up in a Christian church throughout my early years. I would always go on a daily basis thankfully, because my Grandpa was an usher for the church I used to attend. All was well during that time, until he passed away. Once I was in the fifth grade everything started to go downhill. Everybody that knew him would tell me I was his "little mini me." After his passing I wasn't really stable. My mom was always either out working or out who knows where, but I was always with my grandpa and helping taking care of my brothers. I had to mature and have responsibilities at about 5 years of age.
After the passing of my grandpa, we were not stable; moving one place to another as well as different schools. My father was never in the picture until recently. My grandpa to me was more like a father figure to me. While my mother was out I had to be the one walking with my brothers to and from school. I helped my mother as much as I possibly could. At times it was pretty tough but I knew the Lord was by my side no matter what.
My teenage years were the toughest. Not only was I not stable and moving place to place but my mother was going through her own situations and my brothers and sisters and I would hardly ever see her. She was either working or out partying with her friends. I was an emotional wreck but had to not only stay strong for myself but for my younger siblings. At times I did feel alone and just emotionally a mess but this was never shown to others. If people were to describe me, they would say I was shy and quiet but once you get to know me, I would be fun, happy, always smiling and laughing and always making other people smile. Not many knew and I’m not proud to admit it, but I use to physically harm myself because I just felt it relieved my pain and just kinda helped. At the time I basically didn't care. I was bullied for my weight throughout my life which affected me. I can proudly say that I haven't done that for at least 2 years. I can't picture myself doing that again. That is when I had a feeling that I shouldn't be doing such a thing to myself cause God created me this way to love myself; which I do now.
Now that I am healthy, I have been trying to do what God would want me to do and follow the path of the Lord. I feel pretty amazing and happy with myself and I know he loves me no matter what. My mother and I are on better terms than what we were previously which is pretty good to have her in a better place now.
HE IS THE ONLY WAY AND I AM PROUD TO SAY THAT I LOVE HIM UNCONDITIONALLY!