Most of my life I have been an atheist. Christianity just seemed like a huge lie and something that I would never believe in. I dug a hole so deep, that the only way out was to look up and pursue Jesus Christ.
It started with Sophomore year, when I had a year of high school under my belt. My grades were dropping and I saw school as pointless. I started to hang out with a new friend group that began to influence me negatively. From there I made bad choice after bad choice. I gave up on school, yielding straight F's in every class. I gave up on the world around me and just started isolating from everyone around me. It progressively got worse, as I fell more and more into this dark pit. This led me to experimenting with drugs. Those experiments escalated and soon it began to be all I cared about. I started not having money for drugs, and that's when I realized that I could get away with just stealing the things I needed. I began stealing things from Walmart on an almost daily basis, the items ranged from headphones and clothes, to alcohol and cough medicine. As I continued this life, I had no thoughts for those I was hurting and ignoring.
The pit I was in just got darker and darker. Ditching school, theft, and drugs led me to detach myself from everyone. I didn't care about anything, it just was all about me.
I didn’t even think about how this effected those who care about me, like my mom. I had been hiding these things from her for so long, until it all came out one day. I went to Walmart with my typical goal in mind, but this time I got caught. I was immediately grabbed by Walmart security and handed over to the authorities. From there, I was taken to juvenile hall. I was in a holding cell for 8 hours, then transferred to a real cell where I stayed until the end of the following day.
My mom picked me up the next day and it at this point that I began to notice the weight of what I was handing to her. I was devastated to realize how much I had failed her. I knew that something had to change
For a while I fought this battle with myself. I would try to change but I ended up falling back into drugs again. My classes started to fall apart. Everything just went back to how it used to be. However, it was then that l I met one of my now best friends, Aaron Hawkinson. Aaron told me about Jesus and he invited me to church. From the first time of meeting him, he was relentless in getting me to go. I denied his requests, but his invites stuck with me.
I continued down my own path until one day, I was caught with drugs by my mom. We long talk about my life, and with her forgiveness and strength towards me, I saw I needed that life change. It was at that point when I accepted Aaron's invite to church. I went the following week, and there was a guest speaker. He had been an atheist much like me, and I felt like the message was directly for me.
I realized the reason I couldn't fight my problems was because I was going at them myself. I was just trying to be better. But what I needed to do was let Jesus make me better. I needed to fight them with Jesus. Once I realized that, my life was never the same. I began going to church every week, then I started going to High School Small Groups. I made new friends that encouraged me to build my relationship with Jesus. It took time, but now I have the greatest group of friends I could ever hope for. I've been to camp and I've been forgiven by our king. My life was forever changed by my savior, Jesus Christ.